Today, I have a hangover. I am the star player on the team. After the game, which I had singlehandedly won for us, I was given the man of the match award. The club rules dictate that you have to down a jug of beer to yourself each time you win an award. This morning, when I woke up, all of my friends were gone, and I was naked on the side of the road. Next time, I will try not to play so well.